Monday, February 20, 2012

My true joke-story

This story happens to me... last night.

I was in my living room, using my laptop, when i suddenly noticed a sound..

It was music. Sentimental, beautiful worship songs. Which is coming out from outside, from my neighbour, i guess.

But something cool about this is, few days ago i just received a CD from my friend as a birthday gift, which plays these songs too. And it was the exact sequence of songs. So, naturally, i thought.. hmm.. my neighbour has the same CD as I do! This CD must be popular recently that's why my friend bought it for me? I'm not sure. Anyway, the songs are really soft & beautiful... really enjoyed it..

It was 10pm. The songs were still playing. Now it is a bit weird. I was thinking why my neighbour was still playing the songs even though late at night. And kept repeating it too! They must love them as i do.. but it kept repeating the same songs... someone loves those songs that much?

10 something at night. I wanted to go to sleep. I went upstairs to my room. The songs were still playing, but a bit softer now.. Well, nice songs so maybe it can help me sleep well throughout the night... not bad..

The next day (Today) i woke up. My goodness.. the songs are still playing!! WOW... i thought.. this fella must be crazy in love worshiping God with the same songs over and over again!

Then i got myself ready for work. When I wanted to grab my car keys, i couldn't find them! I remembered yesterday evening my dad helped me to re-park my car since it was blocking my grandpa's car. Now where did Dad put my car keys?? I searched everywhere, while asking Mum too. Mum asked, "Go check whether it's in the car". I replied, "Impossible". But i still went to check anyway.

I had a big shock! The car keys were REALLY there in the car. And, most of all, the car engine was turned half on (only car battery was on). And most most most of all, the CD of my songs were playing........

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

"Why Don't You Want Me?"

Loving someone doesn't mean you have to have in possession of him/her. Although it is painful not to have in possession, there's a wonderful truth behind that we shall learn together. In conjunction with Valentines' Day yesterday, let me share with you a devotion that I read today. I find it very touching that i almost cried. Sometimes we would ask "Why Don't You Want me?" since I love you so much... & the feeling of rejection is inevitable..
I pray that the article below would somehow touch your heart too, my beloved friends, and may lead you to another level of understanding of God.. who gives & also teaches us what true love is. I understand it is much difficult to do than say, but together, we can encourage one another =)
Please read the article below:

The LORD spoke his word to me, saying: "Before I made you in your mother's womb, I chose you. Before you were born, I set you apart for a special work (Jeremiah 1:4-5, New Century Version).


It had been a wonderful day. We were all tired after hiking Grandfather Mountain and stopping on the way home to picnic beside a pristine North Carolina creek. Bedtime preparation was proceeding amazingly well. All that mountain air and country cooking was a natural sedative for our two pleasantly exhausted children. I looked forward to joining my husband, Dan, in the front porch swing to cuddle, gaze at the stars and dream of what might be.

Danna, our three-year-old daughter, was out like a light - one down and one to go. Jered, our six-year-old son scrambled into bed, ready to recap the hiking adventure and make a plan for tomorrow. We snuggled under the fluffy down comforter, talking and laughing about how much fun the day had been, then settled into a cozy, comfortable silence.
His question ripped through the still, silent night and my heart, exposing every fear and insecurity carefully buried there. "Why didn't she want me?" Jered softly asked. I knew immediately what he meant. After years of trying to have children naturally, Dan and I had discovered God had a wonderfully different plan for us. We adopted both Jered and Danna as infants and marveled daily at the precious gift of our two children. For years, I had known this question was inevitable but I was still caught off guard by Jered's probing words. My uncertain heart cried out to my Father. I needed an answer – for Jered and for me. Instantly, it came. Bruno!
When Jered was four-years-old, we were given a chocolate colored Labrador puppy that quickly outgrew our small yard, our not-so-understanding neighbors and our apprehensive children. We named this gentle giant Bruno. With each passing day, Bruno became an increasingly frustrated dog. Our postage stamp sized back yard offered little freedom or room for him to romp. Our elderly neighbors did not appreciate his early morning barking alarm and our kids soon refused to venture into the back yard because Bruno, who loved them and wanted to play, delighted in pinning them to the ground with his massive paws. It soon became clear to all of us that we were not the right family for Bruno. 
After an intensive search, we discovered "Adopt a Pet," a remarkable organization that finds homes for animals whose owners, for one reason or another, cannot keep them. We were promised Bruno would be placed in just the right home where he would be loved, well cared for and have plenty of room to run and play. We talked and explained, struggling our way to the difficult decision that it was time to put Bruno up for adoption. Still, on the day they came to pick up Bruno, we all cried. Yes, we knew it was the best plan for Bruno, for us, and for a very excited family that wanted a Labrador, but it still hurt. Sometimes, doing the right thing - the best thing - the highest thing - is also the most painful thing.
As I looked into the beautiful, blue eyes of the little boy I loved more than life itself, I prayed for just the right words. "Jered, do you remember Bruno?" At the memory of the dog, Jered smiled and sadly whispered, "I still miss him." I nodded in agreement and replied, "I know, Son. I know you loved Bruno and were sad when we had to give him away.  But do you remember why we gave Bruno away?" Jered thought for a moment and carefully answered, "Because we loved him so much and we knew we couldn't take care of him right ... and because he wasn't very happy ... and because we wanted the best home in the whole wide world for him."
I paused for a moment, basking in the simple and faithful wisdom of my Father, spoken through the heart of my only son. Now I was ready to answer his unsettling question. "She did want you, honey. And she did love you ... so much, in fact, that she was willing to give you away, just like we gave Bruno away. Just as we wanted what was best for Bruno, your birth mother wanted what was best for you!" I fully recognize that it was an extremely simple illustration for a profoundly complex life circumstance – but it was enough.  
I lay there in the darkness, holding this chosen baby in my arms, listening to him breathe as he drifted into a peaceful, trust-filled sleep. My heart filled with wonder and awe at the faultless plan and complete provision of God in our lives.  With tears of gratitude spilling down my face I thanked God for two courageous young birth mothers, for the plan of adoption that brought our children to us and for God's perfect work through an unusual servant named Bruno. With a contented smile on his face, Jered sighed, turned over and whispered the precious words, "I love you, Mom."
We are all desperate to be loved and to love. We innately search for significance and are created with the powerful need to belong. We pursue worth in worthless places. We demand validation from invalid sources. In the darkness of that mountain cabin, I caught a new perspective of God's stubborn love and the absolute sacrifice He made by giving up His son, Jesus Christ. It is only through a personal relationship with Him that we experience authentic love; a love that displaces thoughts of rejection and banishes feelings of abandonment. It is in this priceless gift that we comprehend the amazing truth that even if we were never wanted or planned by human heart and mind, we were planned and wanted in the heart and mind of God! And that, dear friend, is enough!
"For God so loved the world, that He gave His one and only son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16


Thank You for loving me, God. Honestly, I don't understand that kind of love; a love that sent Jesus Christ to the cross so that I can live. But today, I celebrate Your love. Help me remember I am chosen and because of Your love, I will never be alone or abandoned. You created me for a personal relationship with You. I am not an accident and I am not a mistake. I was created in response to Your plan. Today, I celebrate the fact that I am a chosen child of the King.
In Jesus' name,
Amen.

Monday, February 6, 2012

Blackout

For the first time in my whole life, i experienced BLACKOUT.

That happened last midnight 12.30am when i woke up to go downstairs to get water. As I was sick, my head was feeling heavy.. I walked to the kitchen when all of a sudden, my brain cut off from my consciousness, and i fell down on the floor. I felt something crashing onto me at the same time of my fall. My mind was black & blank for a few seconds & i felt like i was sleeping. But i need to wake up to see what was the thing pressing on me. When i open my eyes, only then i knew it was a rack in which my mum put onions and stuff.

I got myself up, then walk for another 1 or 2 more steps, i went blackout again. I couldn't believe I was so weak! I got up after few seconds too, i guess.

I'm so scared that I may fall anytime again that I quickly went back to my bed to sleep.

I realised that because of the 2 falls, i hurt my head, my arm, my knee & even my lips (the lower part of my lips bleed)!

I didn't know exactly how i fall, because I was unconscious.

What an experience!