My true joke-story

This story happens to me... last night.

I was in my living room, using my laptop, when i suddenly noticed a sound..

It was music. Sentimental, beautiful worship songs. Which is coming out from outside, from my neighbour, i guess.

But something cool about this is, few days ago i just received a CD from my friend as a birthday gift, which plays these songs too. And it was the exact sequence of songs. So, naturally, i thought.. hmm.. my neighbour has the same CD as I do! This CD must be popular recently that's why my friend bought it for me? I'm not sure. Anyway, the songs are really soft & beautiful... really enjoyed it..

It was 10pm. The songs were still playing. Now it is a bit weird. I was thinking why my neighbour was still playing the songs even though late at night. And kept repeating it too! They must love them as i do.. but it kept repeating the same songs... someone loves those songs that much?

10 something at night. I wanted to go to sleep. I went upstairs to my room. The songs were still playing, but a bit softer now.. Well, nice songs so maybe it can help me sleep well throughout the night... not bad..

The next day (Today) i woke up. My goodness.. the songs are still playing!! WOW... i thought.. this fella must be crazy in love worshiping God with the same songs over and over again!

Then i got myself ready for work. When I wanted to grab my car keys, i couldn't find them! I remembered yesterday evening my dad helped me to re-park my car since it was blocking my grandpa's car. Now where did Dad put my car keys?? I searched everywhere, while asking Mum too. Mum asked, "Go check whether it's in the car". I replied, "Impossible". But i still went to check anyway.

I had a big shock! The car keys were REALLY there in the car. And, most of all, the car engine was turned half on (only car battery was on). And most most most of all, the CD of my songs were playing........

"Why Don't You Want Me?"

Loving someone doesn't mean you have to have in possession of him/her. Although it is painful not to have in possession, there's a wonderful truth behind that we shall learn together. In conjunction with Valentines' Day yesterday, let me share with you a devotion that I read today. I find it very touching that i almost cried. Sometimes we would ask "Why Don't You Want me?" since I love you so much... & the feeling of rejection is inevitable..

I pray that the article below would somehow touch your heart too, my beloved friends, and may lead you to another level of understanding of God.. who gives & also teaches us what true love is. I understand it is much difficult to do than say, but together, we can encourage one another =)

Please read the article below:

The LORD spoke his word to me, saying: "Before I made you in your mother's womb, I chose you. Before you were born, I set you apart for a special work (Jeremiah 1:4-5, New Century Version).


It had been a wonderful day. We were all tired after hiking Grandfather Mountain and stopping on the way home to picnic beside a pristine North Carolina creek. Bedtime preparation was proceeding amazingly well. All that mountain air and country cooking was a natural sedative for our two pleasantly exhausted children. I looked forward to joining my husband, Dan, in the front porch swing to cuddle, gaze at the stars and dream of what might be.

Danna, our three-year-old daughter, was out like a light - one down and one to go. Jered, our six-year-old son scrambled into bed, ready to recap the hiking adventure and make a plan for tomorrow. We snuggled under the fluffy down comforter, talking and laughing about how much fun the day had been, then settled into a cozy, comfortable silence.
His question ripped through the still, silent night and my heart, exposing every fear and insecurity carefully buried there. "Why didn't she want me?" Jered softly asked. I knew immediately what he meant. After years of trying to have children naturally, Dan and I had discovered God had a wonderfully different plan for us. We adopted both Jered and Danna as infants and marveled daily at the precious gift of our two children. For years, I had known this question was inevitable but I was still caught off guard by Jered's probing words. My uncertain heart cried out to my Father. I needed an answer – for Jered and for me. Instantly, it came. Bruno!
When Jered was four-years-old, we were given a chocolate colored Labrador puppy that quickly outgrew our small yard, our not-so-understanding neighbors and our apprehensive children. We named this gentle giant Bruno. With each passing day, Bruno became an increasingly frustrated dog. Our postage stamp sized back yard offered little freedom or room for him to romp. Our elderly neighbors did not appreciate his early morning barking alarm and our kids soon refused to venture into the back yard because Bruno, who loved them and wanted to play, delighted in pinning them to the ground with his massive paws. It soon became clear to all of us that we were not the right family for Bruno. 
After an intensive search, we discovered "Adopt a Pet," a remarkable organization that finds homes for animals whose owners, for one reason or another, cannot keep them. We were promised Bruno would be placed in just the right home where he would be loved, well cared for and have plenty of room to run and play. We talked and explained, struggling our way to the difficult decision that it was time to put Bruno up for adoption. Still, on the day they came to pick up Bruno, we all cried. Yes, we knew it was the best plan for Bruno, for us, and for a very excited family that wanted a Labrador, but it still hurt. Sometimes, doing the right thing - the best thing - the highest thing - is also the most painful thing.
As I looked into the beautiful, blue eyes of the little boy I loved more than life itself, I prayed for just the right words. "Jered, do you remember Bruno?" At the memory of the dog, Jered smiled and sadly whispered, "I still miss him." I nodded in agreement and replied, "I know, Son. I know you loved Bruno and were sad when we had to give him away.  But do you remember why we gave Bruno away?" Jered thought for a moment and carefully answered, "Because we loved him so much and we knew we couldn't take care of him right ... and because he wasn't very happy ... and because we wanted the best home in the whole wide world for him."
I paused for a moment, basking in the simple and faithful wisdom of my Father, spoken through the heart of my only son. Now I was ready to answer his unsettling question. "She did want you, honey. And she did love you ... so much, in fact, that she was willing to give you away, just like we gave Bruno away. Just as we wanted what was best for Bruno, your birth mother wanted what was best for you!" I fully recognize that it was an extremely simple illustration for a profoundly complex life circumstance – but it was enough.  

I lay there in the darkness, holding this chosen baby in my arms, listening to him breathe as he drifted into a peaceful, trust-filled sleep. My heart filled with wonder and awe at the faultless plan and complete provision of God in our lives.  With tears of gratitude spilling down my face I thanked God for two courageous young birth mothers, for the plan of adoption that brought our children to us and for God's perfect work through an unusual servant named Bruno. With a contented smile on his face, Jered sighed, turned over and whispered the precious words, "I love you, Mom."

We are all desperate to be loved and to love. We innately search for significance and are created with the powerful need to belong. We pursue worth in worthless places. We demand validation from invalid sources. In the darkness of that mountain cabin, I caught a new perspective of God's stubborn love and the absolute sacrifice He made by giving up His son, Jesus Christ. It is only through a personal relationship with Him that we experience authentic love; a love that displaces thoughts of rejection and banishes feelings of abandonment. It is in this priceless gift that we comprehend the amazing truth that even if we were never wanted or planned by human heart and mind, we were planned and wanted in the heart and mind of God! And that, dear friend, is enough!
"For God so loved the world, that He gave His one and only son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16


Thank You for loving me, God. Honestly, I don't understand that kind of love; a love that sent Jesus Christ to the cross so that I can live. But today, I celebrate Your love. Help me remember I am chosen and because of Your love, I will never be alone or abandoned. You created me for a personal relationship with You. I am not an accident and I am not a mistake. I was created in response to Your plan. Today, I celebrate the fact that I am a chosen child of the King.
In Jesus' name,
Amen.

Blackout

For the first time in my whole life, i experienced BLACKOUT.

That happened last midnight 12.30am when i woke up to go downstairs to get water. As I was sick, my head was feeling heavy.. I walked to the kitchen when all of a sudden, my brain cut off from my consciousness, and i fell down on the floor. I felt something crashing onto me at the same time of my fall. My mind was black & blank for a few seconds & i felt like i was sleeping. But i need to wake up to see what was the thing pressing on me. When i open my eyes, only then i knew it was a rack in which my mum put onions and stuff.

I got myself up, then walk for another 1 or 2 more steps, i went blackout again. I couldn't believe I was so weak! I got up after few seconds too, i guess.

I'm so scared that I may fall anytime again that I quickly went back to my bed to sleep.

I realised that because of the 2 falls, i hurt my head, my arm, my knee & even my lips (the lower part of my lips bleed)!

I didn't know exactly how i fall, because I was unconscious.

What an experience!

My SPECIAL Friend

"今天" (TODAY) .. says my cell group leader Regina. I looked up, & saw this tall young guy. "What!?" came my instinct reply, but I guess I didn't say that out. I dictated along .. "今天".. Oh, so that is his name, our new cell group member! When i saw him, my heart skipped a beat (ok, i'm exaggerating..) .. Cos he is so .. handsome. I rarely will feel that a guy is handsome no matter how my other girl friends would say so. He has an super outgoing personality, too. I wondered why i didn't even noticed him all this while during the service.. & i think i didn't even remember whether pastor has intro him to the congregation during the "welcoming new members" session. oh, did she??

What a special name.. i really thought that is his real name, maybe same pronunciation with different chinese character. Later did i know that his name is Zing Tieng .. chinese name 振典.


Well, that was the first few moments of knowing him. To be honest, whenever i know a good looking + outgoing person, I usually will avoid them. [I'm weird, ok] I will feel like i'm not even qualified to be their friends, be it girls or boys, maybe because I feel that they'll be stuck-up & look down on people, & I won't feel comfortable being together with them. But Zing Tieng is different. He has this inner + outer beauty/handsome. I'm usually attracted more to guys/gals who has the inner beauty that makes them beautiful/handsome, & of cos, a little outer beauty plus some cuteness will enhance it more, like a bonus :)

Having written all these "crap", what is it about my title? You must have guessed that special friend i meant must be Zing Tieng. But what is so special about him? Actually, initially the "special friend" is a title given by him to me =) It was not initiated by me. In the beginning, I'm not at all happy with that title he gave me. Because, he said that I look like I "lack of something". I guess i must be looking like a fool in front of him, that's why. To tell you the truth, initially I was secretly happy because such a handsome guy finds me to chat. But after he said that I look as though I "lack of something", my heart sank. And he says how he likes to HELP people for those who need help. So it means i'm a helpless girl. And that is the only reason he notices me. My heart sank immediately, into the deep dark blue ocean. Even deeper when he said his next target is someone who has depression. In conclusion, me & depression ppl are in the same category. Haiz.. Although many times i think i'm helpless, but it really feels bad when another person confirms you of it.. you get what i mean.

Zing Tieng is someone who claims he can read people's faces. I admit he is correct, sometimes... sometimes only ok.. ;)

When he adds me in FB, i wanted to ignore him because it shows "Jimmy Ling" & i didn't know who Jimmy Ling is, ONLY UNTIL i decided to look at his photo 1st before ignoring him (Actually I wondered why he knows my name Cheryl. Because, this is not a popular name & most ppl will spell it wrongly) Well, i'm glad that I have added him, because we now understand one another so much more from our chat. & knowing about his struggles made me feel more comfortable with him, more wanting to be his comfort and his friend. I enjoyed sharing what I know with him to comfort him, & I enjoyed most when he says that I've helped him a lot. Wow i'm so glad that I can help people in this area, especially in love issues, because since young, i've read a lot of books regarding this, books which talks on Christian values ever since i'm in Form One or Two. And some friends looked for me to talk about their broken heart issues too, but i don't think they ever mentioned that I helped them a lot. I'm also surprised what I said to him which sounds so mature.. I guess God is using me as an angel to him, of which i'm super glad :)

I hope we'll be Special Friends forever. Someone so true to you.. makes you feel warm, appreciated, kind, loving and encouraging.. lifts up your spirit too..

I thank God that He sent that Special Friend to me, & me to him, that together, we can grow into His perfect love, & into maturity in Christ.

Testimony

One of my job requirements is to submit report to MOH (Kuching) every half yearly (Jan & July). It is written somewhere in the form that they require pictures of our project. As that was my 1st time doing it, I clarified with my boss whether pictures are required to be submitted. "No need", was his reply.

After we've submitted it (July 2010), around 1 month later, came the correspondence from MOH. The remark was "No pictures attached. Please add." As simple as that. No due dates. Upon receiving this notice, I requested our Project Assistant to help to take pictures of the projects since most of the time he'll be at the project site. Every week i reminded him to take the pictures, but he always told me he has forgotten about it, & every time my reply was "Oh, it's alright, but please remember ok!" That went on for more than 1 month.

My reply was ever gracious. Why? Because apart from no due dates written, MOH did not give us a call or reminder during the period, & so I thought since we've submitted the report, we can take our sweet time for the submission of pictures.

Finally, the pictures were submitted in September 2010. 2 weeks after my submission, came the correspondent letter from MOH. It says "Late submission" & whack us with a penalty of RM5000 per project! Of course, they gave us a chance to appeal. I was literally depressed when i see it.

I wrote an appeal letter on behalf of the company, & with much disappointment, my appeal was not accepted.

My boss began to put the blame on me. I told him I didn't submit the pictures because he told me there is no need to. He was furious & said I should have studied the regulation & know it better than him! Ok, fine. I did not even put the blame on the Project Assistant for giving the pictures to me late, because I did not want to be scolded why I did not opt to go to take the pictures myself instead.

I felt so unfair. Yet I said nothing at all. Boss showed black face to me everyday & things get worse whenever I made any other small mistake. I was totally unhappy that I cried almost every night.

I cried to God for help, for giving me the wisdom to tackle every challenges that I face everyday, & I prayed that I'll be more careful in doing things so as not to make any careless mistakes so that I'll not have to suffer facing a boss who showed black face to me whenever I made even the smallest mistake.

The MOH issue dragged on for a few months. Finally we received their reply confirming the penalty and asking us to pay within 2 weeks! Boss came up with the idea of using "mercy", that is, I was to write a personal appeal letter, not on behalf of the company, but on behalf of MYSELF, to MOH.

The MOH officer, J, told me ever since their new Permanent Secretary, A, is in charge, penalties are imposed & he's a very strict person. J even said that if my appeal is accepted, I shall be the 1st in history! Even if J wants to help me, he's unable to influence A's decision.

I decided to tell my cell group leader, Regina, about this issue, hoping that she would pray for me.

In January 2011, I heard from J that MOH will have an exhibition in Miri, and they wanted us to meet with the Permanent Secretary & explain this case to him face to face. Just a week before that, Pastor's sermon was on being "Bold & Courageous". Although i'm unhappy that this thing happened to me, I trust God & I have the feeling that they'll waive the penalty since they ask me to meet them.

As A was with the VIPs all along, I did not manage to talk to him, but I found J, the assistant, in which I explained to him what happened. I even cried in front of him. He said he'll try his best to help me by telling his boss, A, about my explanation. The final decision was still was A.

After coming back from CNY holidays, I called MOH again & J said the penalty has been waived. I felt like I'm in a dream. God is ever gracious to us if we humble ourselves before Him & surrender all our cares unto Him.

I remembered one of Regina's prayers for me was to let "Cheryl have greater faith in God" through this encounter. This encourages me. Because I'm sure God wants me to have greater faith in Him. He also wants all His beloved children to have greater faith in Him, by using what I've been through, to bless you all.

"Lord I offer my life to You,
Everything I've been through,
Use it for Your glory"

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGdJC9hTflM)

Before my MOH issue is settled, during those times, whenever we sang this song in church, I have a strong feeling, because, that was my earnest prayer.
During that time, I wondered how bad things that happened to me can be used by God for His glory. Now I know.

Macaroni

Macaroni that i cooked.
Specially dedicated for Lina to see.
^^
It was full of cheese & creamy...yum! (I melted cheese to make it o!)

Sibu Masland Church

During our Sibu Trip (10 - 12 Sept Raya break), we visited Sibu Masland Methodist Church for their Sunday service.

It is really a super beautiful church, & i was super amazed by its super design.

(I can't find where i put my handphone cable due to the very forgetful me, so i can only search the picture of the church using google to show it here. When u meet me face to face, I can show u the pics i've taken, it's still in my hp.)

It's really breath-taking ...



(Photo courtesy of someone whom I dunno)

View other pics here ...

http://dr-david-ling.blogspot.com/2009/05/blog-post_25.html

http://sibu.org/bbs/viewthread.php?action=printable&tid=5636

Really fantastic, isn't it?

A piece of my thoughts...

It would definitely cost a lot for such great masterpiece.
But then again, if people are attracted to the appearance of the church, then walks in then hears the gospel then become Christians, that would be great.

In my opinion, I would rather build smaller churches and have them scattered in more places. The reason:
1) The gospel can be spread in more places.
2) More convenient for people to go to church nearby their home.
Most important point whereby I think they neglect:
3) In smaller churches, people can fellowship with one another well. Will feel like in 1 big family. Will have deeper relationship with people and with God. In big churches like Masland Church (Sibu) or Mei Ann Church (Miri), we can't feel the sense of BELONGING. Whether we are new-comers, whether we go to sunday service, cell groups, etc.. nobody seems to care or even notice!

Just a piece of my thoughts. No offence or anything. After all, everything has its pros and cons. Just from which degree you are looking at =)